This guy who is always leaving dirty socks on the floor of my house and
I were just getting out of Charlie and the Chocolate Factory (whose
superfluous subplot drove me wild with hate) when he said, "Hey, it's
midnight. Want to see if we can get a copy of Harry Potter and the
Half-Blood Prince?"
Jessica Burgess
Clearly Unedited
This was a tense moment for me. Unlike him, I do not flaunt my
geekiness. I hide it under a thick layer of aloofness and body fat. So I
shrugged and said in a voice of weary indulgence, "Fine. If you really
want to."
First we went to Borders, but the entire population of the universe was
there. I don't like crowds, unless I am drinking, and Borders does not
sell alcohol. I have checked.
So we went to Wal-Mart, and after looking for the book in the lawn and
garden section (the theater where we saw the movie had offered
alcohol), we finally found it in the lay-away department.
"Say," I said, feigning nonchalance. "We should probably get two, huh?"
The guy turned to me in surprise. "Why? We can take turns reading it."
My geekiness suddenly surfaced and roared loudly.
"WE'RE GETTING TWO. You read as slow as Christmas, and I'm not waiting."
Mouth agape, staring at me, he silently handed over his credit card
(with a hand that shook slightly) to the cashier.
And I was right! Buying two was a good idea, because I finished
mine in a few hours, even managing to find a typo along the way. (It's
on page 10.)
He, on the other hand, is still slogging through. I like to dance around
in front of him while he's reading and say things like, "Have you gotten
to the part with the Dark Mark yet? Have they found out what a Horcrux
is yet? HAVE YOU REACHED THE PART WHERE – ow. Don't hit me, that's
domestic violence."
And I don't like violence. Unless I have been drinking.
Jessica offers literary analysis of the Harry Potter series in
exchange for beer at jburgess@QuickDFW.com.
