It always seemed obvious to me that there was some sort of secret "underground scene" in Dallas.
Jessica Burgess
Clearly Unedited
I just never expected to find out about it via press release.
The occasion called for a Paris Hilton-esque entrance. So I dug out my cleanest sweatshirt, girded my soul, and attended my very first alcohol-launch party last weekend.
The event, held at the Gypsy Tea Room, was designed to celebrate the new and exciting X-Rated Vodka – reportedly the first vodka ever created to "delight women."
I'm sure you are wondering how, exactly, a brand of vodka delights women. Does it march on Washington for equal rights? Is it particularly skilled at certain sex acts?
No. But it does taste good, which seemed, after two or three drinks, pretty darn delightful enough.
The crowd was young, hot and dressed to the nines. This guy who I dragged to the party with me was very impressed.
"I was trying to buy some fishnets yesterday, but they were all sold out," he said. "Now I know why."
Attendee Robert Taylor, 33, was waaaay ahead of me when it came to the launch-party culture.
"Have you been to one of these before?" I asked him and his friends.
"Oh yes!" he said. "Vox Raspberry, Absolut Peach, Stoli Elite. ... " He rattled off a collection of booze that would healthily stock a home bar.
He saw my holy-crap expression and smiled.
"We've been around," he said.
Clearly, there's a lot to learn about launch parties. For example, they have more to offer than free booze. There is also entertainment.
Choreographer Roger Lee, a Dallas native who has worked for the likes of Britney Spears, developed a dance routine for the party based on the personality of the vodka.
Butt-shaking music blasted through the club as, up on stage, one masked guy and a bunch of taut-bodied women cavorted violently, wearing little French-maid outfits and military uniforms that would definitely not provide much protection against shrapnel to the abdomen.
"That's quite a personable vodka," I thought, as I glugged some more and fervently hoped to get more alcohol-launch party press releases soon.
Tequila, for instance. That sounds good.
Next weekend, Jessica is probably hanging out with the Hilton sisters. That's just how she rolls. E-mail her at jburgess@quickdfw.com.
